Yeah I suppose I can’t deny it any more. Time is ticking away and I need to be sure I’m ready for the birth of my babies. They aren’t supposed to show until the first week in May (when the hospital would like me in for inducement) but who knows how impatient they’ll be? The way they’re pounding me right now I wouldn’t be surprised if they showed up tomorrow!
So… I need to prepare.
Easy things, like moses baskets, bottles, car seats and the like are not what have me worried right now. In fact I’m not even all that worried about the money. I should be – what with the price of everything being absolutely phenomenal these days – but I’m not. What I’m worried about is my writing.
I’m worried that I’ll expect too much of myself and then get all panicky and twitchy when I can’t write because I’m too tired, too busy or whatever. For March I only just hit my word count, so its starting already, compared to January. So it seems like is mental preparation I need to do more than anything else.
It was this post that brought it all home for me. Write It Sideways is a blog I’ve been following for a little while and I was delighted, when I found it, to realise that not only was Suzannah pregnant, but she was expecting twins, just like me! Since then, I’ve been following closely and picking up tips as and when I can. The arrival of the above post in my emails (followed by a forward from a friend!) made me realise that I’ve not done much planning of my own in terms of what I can and can’t do when my twins arrive.
This is my first pregnancy; I’ve no clue what its really going to be like. Of course I have a vague idea that I’ll have very little time for me or sitting quietly at the PC. But how much less time will I have? In the first weeks, I’m sure I’ll have no time at all! In the months that follow, I may start to have a little more time, but it won’t be lots. Nothing like I’m used to, even with a 9-5 job. That’s obviously because children aren’t a 9-5 job; they’re a 24/7 responsibility and treasure. Couple that with the fact that I’ll have two of them to handle, well I just don’t know…!
I’ve accepted that I won’t be able to write much. But I should be able to edit things; sitting quietly with my trusty Red Pen of Dooooooom and some work in hard copy that I plan to pull to bits and put back together again. Maybe I’ll be able to write a short story or two; or cram in some flash fiction every now and then. The way I see it, I certainly won’t be lacking inspiration when they arrive! In fact, I’m afraid that I’ll want to write more than ever, just to express how I feel about them. Strong emotions always make me want to pick up a pen or sit at the keyboard.
Hmm. I think the most important thing I can do, at this stage, is prepare my mind. This blog is easy after all; I do tend to write about a week ahead as it is, and there are other projects, reviews and fun things that I can upload to these pages to tide you over in the interim. I’ll even say that if anybody is interested in writing a guest post here, then they are more than welcome to contact me to do so! In fact, I’d like that a great deal.
So long as my brain and my heart is ready to accept that there is a short ‘break’ on the way, then I won’t fall to pieces.
Yeah… that should do it. 
